When I Think I’ve Failed | Faculty Commons

David G. Loomis
Economics, Illinois State University

Ever felt like your attempts at ministry in the university have been a failure?

For the past nine years, I have led a Bible study for international students. I would like to highlight two of my “failures” in this Bible study that God showed me were part of His plan.

The group started from meeting one-on-one with a Chinese student who was interested in studying the Bible. He later asked if some of his Chinese friends could come as well. Through the years, the “Chinese” Bible study has waxed and waned while including Romanians, Kenyans, Koreans, Liberians, Indians, etc.

On The Road

One young Chinese woman came to my Bible study for two years while she studied in our master’s program. She attended faithfully but never came to faith in Jesus, describing herself as “on the road” but not ready to commit.

Upon graduating from the economics program, she enrolled in the math department and came to my Bible study regularly for two more years. At the end of four years together, she had not accepted Christ, and I felt that I had failed.

She took an actuarial job in Chicago but God was still working in her life. She came back to visit me years later to tell me that she had accepted Christ and was baptized. She talked about the impact of her four years in the Bible study. I had planted but it was God who made it grow according to His timing.

Another Chinese young man was my graduate assistant and I once invited him to my Bible study. He never came to the study and I did not pressure him to come. In fact, I never remember having a “spiritual” conversation with him. I felt that I had failed to make any impact on his life for Christ.

His Ways Are Higher

Years after graduation, he emailed me to tell me that both he and his wife had become Christians and he pointed to my Christian example while he was my student and graduate assistant as being significant in his decision.

There are dozens of other students that I felt that I have failed to have a positive impact upon during my years at the university. But God has reminded me through these two examples that “[His] ways are higher than [my] ways and [His] thoughts than [my] thoughts” (Is. 55:9).

So be encouraged! God has called us to be a faithful witness and to leave it to Him “to make it grow.” As Paul told the Corinthians: ”I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes it grow.”